After that 30-day initiation proving that you can successfully handle wine with dinner and beer at ballgames, you come back and begin 60 days of abstinence. If you make it to 60 Days, then you go 90 days. This all sounds well and good until you add up the math and realize that no part of this is anywhere close to sobriety.

• Don’t get down on yourself because you can’t get wasted at the bar with your friends anymore.
• Ask for extra hours at work if you’re having a hard time with roommates.
• That includes not becoming a victim to life’s circumstances.
• Choosing a new hobby to occupy your time is not always easy.
• Yes, I no longer have the option of using a substance to escape my feelings or problems.

High-Intensity Drinking: When “Going Hard” Goes Too Far

One of the easiest ways to forget your own problems is to give back to people less fortunate than yourself. When you’re feeling low, instead of sitting at home in isolation feeling sorry for yourself, get up and head to the local soup kitchen or veteran’s association. Spend time focused on someone other than yourself and your own situation won’t seem so bad.

I’ve even found myself ghosting my AA sponsor.

You can always improve how you fare in sobriety by looking at where you can improve your quality of life. If you are hungry, even if that is not your main issue, get something healthy to eat. If you are feeling exhausted, refresh with a quick walk outside or a coffee nap if you can. drug addiction treatment Being overly polite might seem kind, but it often leads to problems anyway, in relationships, with friends, and at work.

The Habits Of Emotionally Healthy People

For most of us, drinking is just what we do—to celebrate, to unwind, to feel at ease in social settings. It’s rarely questioned, and when it is, it’s often framed as a problem to fix. And yes, sometimes I get jealous of my friends that can drink normally.

Don’t get down on yourself because you can’t get wasted at the bar with your friends anymore. You don’t want to fall down that rabbit hole. But I’m going to explore solutions for people who sit at various points along the “sobriety is so boring” spectrum. Take what applies to you and leave whatever doesn’t. My friends and I got together for happy hours after work.

It may also be helpful to get to know yourself on your own, first. Spending sober time becoming familiar with your body intimately can help you better communicate your needs to someone else when you feel ready for that step. When I was drinking, it never occurred to me that I was an introvert. I would have classified myself as someone who loved to be around people and go out with them at night.

• Sometimes I wouldn’t know what to do and I couldn’t do anything–even leave the house some days.
• I just want to be normal and happy and talk about normal shit, like what books I’m reading, etc.
• Thankfully, there have only been a few times when someone at the table hasn’t pointed it out on my behalf and adjusted accordingly.
• Fortunately, there are more ways than ever to connect with like-minded people who are fellow travelers on this path.
• It’s rarely questioned, and when it is, it’s often framed as a problem to fix.

I believe that’s why so many people are drawn to the sober curious movement. This curiosity isn’t driven by fear or the need to “fix” anything. It’s about exploring what’s possible when you drink less. I truly believe that limiting alcohol isn’t a restriction—it’s an opportunity. That’s just the nature of existence – there are ups and downs on the rollercoaster. Yes, I no longer have the option of using a substance to escape my feelings or problems.

But now, I get to be the person who makes sure they get home safe from the bar. And I’m also the one who doesn’t wake up with a hangover. I mentioned that boredom can unlock old behaviors. At this point, I’m therapized and program-focused enough that I can tell when I need other people to talk to, even though all I want to do is isolate and go dark.

Fears About Sobriety That Will Sabotage Your Recovery

If you’re like most drinkers, you’ve likely surrounded yourself at some point with a group of people who also drink. I’d argue that many of us gravitated to a group of friends who have drinking habits that align with our own, and we did this because we didn’t want sober friends. I’ve spent the last seven years researching and understanding alcoholism, addiction, and how people get sober. Additionally, I examine the way mental and physical health as well as our relationships with others impact the reasons people drink and their role in maintaining sobriety long-term. If you quit drinking and experience any new or worsening mental health symptoms, please consider therapy.

Additional resources to fight boredom in sobriety:

Before I quit drinking, I never really used to care about dividing the bill down the middle with a group. At some point after college, it just didn’t matter if someone had a meal that was four dollars more than mine, or if they ate more edamame, or even if they had one more drink than I did. Not only because my portion of the check is significantly smaller than anyone else at the table, but also because I refuse to invest in Big Alcohol. It’s part of the sobriety package, and it’s not necessarily a bad thing.